Monday, November 27, 2006

Ferdinand and If

"Morning all."

"Hi Ferd you feeling better?" Susan (female of the household) croons, "ah look at you two, Dolly you kissing Ferdi better?"
"You seen my nail Ferdinand? Broken to the quick." Dolly said waving her paw in my face.

"She's been so worried about you Ferdi."
"You're up then? Well it is Monday morning!" Dolly hissed.
"It is very exhausting being a party planner."
"Bloomin' exhausting! Party planning?" Dolly said as she scratched her ear. "What about all the cleaning?"
"Cleaning? Place is spotless."

"Spotless, spotless!" Scratching.
"You great ginger twit." Scratch, scratch.
"Dolly you got fleas?" Susan asked.
"Yes from Jim the grave yard cat."
"Well you were very close." I proffered by way of explanation.
What, I... you...Electra, I'm ~(*&’# speechless! You ginger. You ginger!..." Scratch, scratch.
And she bopped me on my nose -which is just in recovery from the bite of that bad tempered Micky.
"Dolly! Stop it! You know Ferd isn't well!"
Scratch, scratch.
"Umhh, what you need is some flea spray."

"Come on Doll."
"What? No! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeas eeeeeeeeese, he's a cad, the lazy blighter. Er, no! noooooooooooooooo! Yuk, Yuk."

"Just look at the state of me Ferd."
"Well you certainly will be flealess -friendless too! tee hee!"
And do you know what? She promptly bopped me on the nose again!
"Dolly will you stop hitting Ferdinand? Poor Ferdi, come and have a little cream. I won't spray you today as you're not yourself."

"I don't believe it, I get covered in chemicals he gets cream, I get a broken nail he gets thank you messages. It's not fair! Horrible big ginger rat, yes Ferdinand, I said rat!"

Don't know what's up with Dolly? females eh! God luv em!

IF you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too,......

......Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a man, my son!

Ferdinand and Rudyard Kipling


THE ZOO said...

we is soooo sorry we didnt maked the party ferdi and yoo being an excellent host and planner an all. our beans was way bad an didnt leave the 'puter on for us over the weekend. we promise to come to yoos next soiree.

Anonymous said...

I agree Doll, he's getting away with far to much, and as for the femail human of the household, Spec Savers for her.

nemesis said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ferdinand said...

I do believe susan has 20/20 vision pity the blind can't see!

Hot(M)BC said...

Oh oh, fleez are no fun. Who's Jim the Graveyard cat? Do all Graveyard cats get fleez?

Ferdinand said...

Jim is the graveyard cat and he lives in St James' church, in the cellar, in an old wooden seed tray, on sacking. I don't know, but there is a cat flap in the catholic church door, but I haven't ben introduced yet, Hmm I might just pop over and take a look.