Lil, because she had an operation and is recuperating, has been granted the right to pee in the house. I kid you not! Honestly!

"FERDINAND!”

"Streuth!" Can’t a being get some peace? A piece of peace?

“Ferdinand, I’ve a bone to pick with you!” Dolly Said.

"Turkey, chicken perhaps?"

I have closed my emerald eyes. 'Tis Sunday. The sun is shining, warming me, my box and I. Brian started it. The great mower race – brummm, brumm, bloody bruum. Just got my shut eye.— All Sunday, most of Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, enough already! I need to sleep. Brian is the winner. His lawn is cut. It has pinstripes. The sod could work in the city and wear a bowler hat.

No one can compete. Apart from his neighbour who’s now going in for the challenge, and just as I was beginning to nod off again. His neighbour once removed began, and so it went on, and on, and on... The neighbour next to the neighbour next to...

I haven't slept.

Mow mow.

I am retiring to my tea chest creation by the canal bank.

Peaceful here. Just the sound of the water lapping against...

What the—

Bloomin barge!

It’s 5 o’-bloomin'-clock in the morning...

Phut phut phut.

Oh, go phut yourself!

Dolly : Ferdinand is in a really bad mood! Tea hee.

His stupid ginger head

Ferdinand has returned. I don’t want to know where he's been... I can see his stupid ginger head beneath me. But he doesn’t know that I know that he has returned!

I’m in my box. It’s a nice sunny day. Dolly is sitting on my glass roof. Right above my head...
It’s very distracting! All those stripes!

He’s typing. I’ll just sit here. He can see me. He knows I’m not bothered. Knows I don’t give a toss! I have no interest in where he has been. Although he has been gone a month... Not that I'm curious.  Nor did I care.

"DOLLY! DOOLLLEEEEEEEE. DOLLEEEEEEE. It’s Ferd, He is back!"

"Lilly ! Shhhhhh!"

"What?"

"Shhhhh."

"Shh? But!"

"Shh"!

"Shh! But... It’s Ferd!"

"Shush."
"He has..."
"Shhh."

"Returned home! Safe and sound.. Where has he been? It’s weeks. What did he say?"

"Lil. Be cool!"

"Be what?"

"Cool!"

"Cool? I am cool. The radiator’s not on and it’s none too warm. In fact I have goose bumps."

"Lil?"

"Yes, Dolly?"

"Never mind..."

I’d rather not live in a tea chest.

"Ferdinand?"
"Yes Lil."
"Ferd!"
"Yes Lil."

"Don’t mean to appear ungrateful or any thing! But I’d rather not live in a tea chest. I know you’ve been to a lot of trouble, but I’d rather lay on a radiator. This radiator if you don’t mind..."

"But Lil..."

"Ferd, I know  you’ve worked very hard. I’m not sure I could cope with the damp. I have a bit of Arthur Itus. Made him walk with a limp too and he was famous."
"Who?"
"Arthur! It's shocking the dull ache you get in your bones."
"Irish?"
"Did you know him?"
"No."
"Came from Blarney..."
"Lil. You may not a have a choice! You may have to..."

The witch makes smells!

I have been looking through the archives. Family documents! Surprising what turns up, or not, as the case may be. But this old movie, from the silent era, directed by my great, great, great, X great uncle is a great discovery.
Oh, yes. We, the Felidae's are a famous old theatrical family. Right back to Shakespeare and beyond... May I introduce to you? The silent. The old. The very creepy...
 The witch makes bad smells!

Ferdinand: A cat in control in an out of control world!

Bill and me. Have enough money (from the work we did for the experimental lab) to buy and furnish two tea chests, plus purchase the feline rights of land grab to position said chests.
I have been listening to the news. A recession or depression, or maybe just a big hole is arriving. I know from experience -plus reading the papers and many history books- when such a hole appears we pets tend to get thrown overboard or out.
So contingency plans have been drawn up. I haven't told the girls yet, Nno need to worry them unnecessarily.
Bill and me are in control.
So two tea chests upturned under a laurel tree, by the canal, lined with cushions and duvets are already in position. That's the housing taken care of...
I now need to work out how we are going to feed ourselves...

Ferdinand: A cat in control in an out of control world!

I am Ferdinand cat compass.

Spats the cat turned up late for dinner. Three years late!

Oh, yes. The homing instinct of we felines is astounding. We have magnets in our heads!
Ferdinand. Cat compass.

Things that have to be done before we close our eyes!

Just before I turn in:

1/Tuck Lil in.
2/Make Doll a Libby's.

(Phew the things that have to be done before we close our eyes!)

Anyway. Quite forgotten where I was...

Aha!
Remembered.
I have renewed the Ferdi Review.

Oh, yes.
Now if I could only find the link.

It is late...

I've been up up all day...

Where is it?
Exhausted myself!
Laying on a radiator isn't easy. Not when you're stressed.
No!
No good - can't find the link.
I'll have to publish this later.